Burnt out – just a skosh

Unfortunately since I left my job ballet has taken precedent in what I do with my life. It’s been like this since September, but I mean, it’s the one biggest schedule commitment I have. It interrupts my artistic flow often when I have to go run off and shove myself into a pair of tights and a black leo.

In short it feels like Ballet has become my JOB, and that’s not right. I don’t get paid for my volunteered TA work, but I get the pure joy of watching the girls and boys grow and learn, try, etc. I get to work on my technique. Stretch and be apart of the ballet world in some small degree.

I just find it distracting that I have to take 3-4 hours out of my day to be at class by 5pm, then only an hour and then back home to most likely just cook dinner or veg because sometimes TA takes it out of you.

There’s also my pointe shoes, even the ever so “perfect” Gaynor Mindens don’t fit me just right, and my ever growing pile seems almost LAUGHABLE.

I think it’s just a number of weird and negative feelings mixed in with not having a real break to myself since, I don’t know when. I’ve been ballet-ing straight even through the summer since my wedding in 2011.

Overall, foo~ I’m bushed. I could use a vacay. Now that it’s May 1st I only have a month and a half to finish and perfect my recital dance and not wheeze and sputter out mid way through it. (Only because I’m not perfectly warmed up and or I need to be better, errr… latter?) THEN when everyone is settling in for the end of the class schedule and flying out to do their vacations. I booked myself a week long 8 hours a day of ballet at the Sun King Dance Intensive in Vancouver this year! *headdesk* I am excited, I just have to get my mojo back.

After all that in mid July I’ll go visit family in Las Vegas, get burnt to a crisp and visit one of the Capezio dance stores there to be fitted for some new pointe shoes to take home! YEA! Before I know it I’ll be prepping for Nutcracker again.

I had two cupcakes for breakfast – I love being an adult.

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2 thoughts on “Burnt out – just a skosh

  1. I’m so jealous of your summer intensive!!! Just think like this: not everybody is as lucky as you are! 😉 Nooooo, I’m just being mean now. You don’t HAVE to love every moment and you can take a vacay away from ballet (this sounds cool read out loud) if you need one!! ….Only to come back and really appreciate every moment once again 🙂

  2. I can’t imagine doing as much as you do! Shortly before my injury that yanked me out of ballet I started feeling burned out. I stopped going to classes to sleep in or just relax. Going to ballet (and writing about it) started to feel like a chore. So in some ways, my injury was a nice break from ballet. It gave me the time to appreciate it and miss it (like crazy) and allowed me to love it even more.

    I LOVE being an adult–I once justified eating ice cream for breakfast because it was better for me than a single pop tart was.

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