A post to help clarify. There was a post made for the Adult Ballerina Project made on September 30th 2015. It quoted me out of context. They assumed my quote from a post I made during my recovery was concerning something else. “You’d think I’d be dying to go to dance. But I don’t. I want to be normal again most of all.” What I meant by this- was that I want to feel like a normal human being. When you go through surgery you feel excessively exhausted. Less than a human- so zombie like. I slept constantly, and was awake in the beginning every 20 min. with large lulls of sleeping. Later it grew to an hour of being conscious, still with long lulls of sleeping. I also wanted (and still do) my leg to feel whole again.
When you go through surgery like that, you cut through several nerves, and your body sometimes over reacts. My achilles has been a constant struggle, and the feeling in my heel is still very little. Some people may also be discouraged by the large scar that’s left behind. Luckily I’m very happy with my scar, but like I said. I still am a little irritated and working on the stiffness and inflexibility of my achilles.
My “normal-ness” did not mean to reference that I was no longer interested in being a dancer any more. That I wanted to go back into the fray, or the grayness that is the perceived average person. I could not give up dance. I do not seek to be anyone else, or anything less than myself. I am proud to say that I am an Adult Ballet Dancer.